Its mid week….

…..and i am feeling old and tired! I don’t think its the fact that I am officially turning 39 in a few days, more the turns of life making me feel all of them these days!

 We have been afllicted with a virus in the house, doesn’t seem we are alone, something is ‘doing the rounds’ Alhamdulileh! A much needed cleansing for sins insha’allah. But always a releif to see your little sleepy sad baby come back to gigling and enjoying lifes adventures masha’allah.

 Another casualty this week has been my phone! So no pics for the near future unless a new phone magically appears or I find something suitable in my albumns to brighten the place up.

 On a more serious note I attended the funeral of a lovely sister whom I have not seen for maybe 11 years, but whose warmth and love of her deen never left me. After 9 years fighting cancer, insha’allah she is now in a much better place. May Allah grant her a wide grave and jannat al firdous insha’allah.  And may those she left behind have patience and abundant reward through their patience. Ameen

 My father is also gravely ill, it is really just a question of time with terminal lung cancer. And for me as a muslima facing the reality of losing a familly member that has not come into Islam. And thinking of what their grave holds for them. Living in Algeria many people ask about your familly back home and how are they….but they really have very little understanding of the meaning of having a non muslim familly, especially in the face of death and will often make the same duas they would make for a muslim, thinking of them as the people of the book and not really as kafrs or non muslims.

 My father and I have not been close since I embraced Islam. He was never happy with my choices and it has only been in the face of death that we are talking more. People often talk of regrets, insha’allah I will have non. I have tried to talk about islam, he rejected it. He doesnt even have any particular religious beliefs…..seems funny that he has arranged his own funeral with a church service and place in a church graveyard….or maybe that is some kind of recognition in the face of death.

 It is kind of strange, but yet kind of beautiful to be in the position of waiting for a new life within our familly, and the passing of another life also within the familly. These are reminders that Allah leaves for us. To all my beautiful sisters make a priority in your lives to make dua for our own famillies and each others famillies. May Allah remove the blindness from their hearts and guide them to the truth. May he make us steadfast upon the straight path, ameen.

 These times make you so grateful for the blessings Allah has bestowed upon us, insha’allah these feelings will stay close, so that we can feel close to our Lord and not forget that ever present cycle of life of births and more importantly of deaths, ameen. And when all of mankind are gathered on that last day, may we be in the shade of Allah, with his mercy showering us. Ameen


10 thoughts on “Its mid week….

  1. masha’Allah.. thanks for this post sis, heartfelt and much needed for me. alhamdulillah. Im sorry to hear about your father and have to agree about the ‘people not understanding about having a non muslim family’ even in uk, many muslims I meet find it hard to really understand the difficulties I have. Noones fault, but it frustrates me that they wont even acknowledge this fact and go on acting like they understand how it is, when even other converts dont fully understand.

  2. Ameen! Dear SJ, your post has touched me and brought a tear to my eye. Jazakillahu khayran for an excellent reminder and a post that comes straight from your heart. May Allah guide all of our families to the truth and keep us all on that path.


  3. what a beautiful yet sad post….im so sorry to hear that you are going through theese difficult times…having lost a mum I understand the pain and inshallah your father will accept in his heart…ameen to the duas…

  4. Ameen sister – I’m sorry you are going through this at what should be such a happy time, but as you said it is a reminder for us all. Do not give up hope till the last second though sister for you never know who’s heart Allah will open. I will make du’aa for you and for your family, inshallah you will make du’aa for me and mine too.

  5. salamu aleykum,

    brakAllahu fikhi for reminding us,

    as sister Soumayya said, till the last minute we don’t know …..Never loose hope, i know real story’s from very old and sick peoples who became muslims when they were near to death subhanAllah.
    One of them i know personnaly, her daughter made dawa to her for more than 30 years…
    This sister told me that she was making more du’a for the guidance of her mother than she made for herself!And the mother couldn’t accept Islam directly from her daughter but from her son in law.

    Whatever your father is,and whether he will become muslim or not he is in need. Maybe your children could write him something lovely and draw something nice reminding of jenna with all the pleasures in fruits, plants etc… to soften his heart.
    You know it’s very difficult to make dawa to your parents, it’s hard for them to accept that their children may be wiser and knowledgefuller than themselves, maybe the remind of our creator could pass easier from the grandchildren or the son in law.
    I witnessed often that many people trust more in men than in women.
    I know what you are passing through, i share the same qadr to have a non-muslim family, and which is concerned the last years more and more by issues like cancers. I found a little door to enter which is to remind them to do du’a (although they claim to be nonbelievers), i was surprised that it seems to releave them a little bit in moments of weakness. At least it makes them discover a little bit of their fitra.

    May Allah t’ala give you releave with your family and the new life coming inchAllah, mashAllah!

    salamu aleykum wa rahmtullah

  6. a lovely post mum, I make lots of dua for him, but non seem to have been accepted :(, I feel so sorry for him, why is he so blinded from the right path? Why?? I don’t want him to burn in his grave and in hell for ever 😥 its so sad, and horrid to think of, I wish he did’nt have cancer, I would have gone to see him when I am older, make da’awa for him, and get to meet him for once. Even though I never met him, I love him, and feel that he is familly, and that familly love is in my heart, just like my aunt I never met, I’d love to one day… May allah guide him to the right path, ya allah, ameen.

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